His kindergarten year began with a storm of tears, my own, and they continued to rain down all year-both his and mine. I didn’t want him there. The public school closet to us. The one rated highest in our county. The one people move to our area in order to send their children there.
I wanted to teach him at home. I wanted to teach him about the world through the eyes of God. I wanted to nurture the mind of this bright boy who never stops asking questions. It’s at home where I knew he could be himself-idiosyncracies, sensitivities and all.
We don’t always get that for which our hearts most yearn. Even if what we want is considered by most to be a “good” thing. Sometimes God has another story planned for us. And sometimes He simply calls us to wait.
It’s often in the waiting where He does His work.
It’s there that He chisels away at the idols buried in our hearts, removing what keeps us from desiring Him most of all. It’s in the waiting, when we let go of what we most desire, that we begin to yearn for Him alone. He needs to take precedence in our hearts.
I cried as I dropped him off each morning last year. He cried most afternoons and many mornings when I woke him up to leave for school. The year was rough on both of us. His fast paced mind rarely challenged. A teacher who didn’t think he warranted any extra attention.
I gave to Him my hearts desire, submitted to the concerns of my husband, prayed for His will and waited. My husbands heart about homeschooling changed during the [ast year and this past week we started homeschooling for the first time.
Joy indeed comes in the morning.
Thanking Him this week for the hard, ugly beautiful refining through which we all have to go. Thanking Him for the joy that comes when we’ve been stripped of everything that keeps us from Him. When it’s all taken away, we are free to finally experience the true depths of His love and grace. And thanking Him that He disciplines us for our good.
Continuing to count all the blessing from God:
773-786
Privilege of homeschooling my son
Our fun first day of school
Building forts
Boys sitting and reading together under the fort
That God is our Strong Tower (Proverbs 18:10)
Productivity
Date night, more planning for our anniversary trip and a little shopping
Empathy from one brother for another
When the boys forgive me for my failures as a mom
The Holy Spirit’s prompting to ask forgiveness
Swimming every afternoon
Our homeschool group kickoff
Shopping with friends, great deals and fun fellowship
A new camera for me to learn how to use-so much better than the camera on my phone!
Wonderful post. Your little boy is precious, so pleased to hear that you’re able to homeschool as your heart wanted to do. Thanks for sharing this week!
Thanks for sharing of God’s faithfulness. A beautiful testimony of His graces.
The refining in the waiting…much of the time…we are like our children…if we just give them everything they ask for…how much do they appreciate any of it…but when we/children receive something we have waited for…”worked” for…how much more we treasure the gift.
Enjoy the gift of home schooling…you may treasure this more than others who did not have to go through the refiners fire to school their children.
Blessings~
I dropped off my little ones to school for the first time today- and am so grateful He is near to the broken-hearted. They had a great day- and so did I- we’re growing! And for that I am thankful. Blessings on your school year!
Thanks for sharing this today, and good luck to you and your son this school year! I hope your homeschooling experience is all you dream of, and more!
As a mom to a boy with a tender heart, I can totally relate to your feelings.
A few weeks ago we were talking about Kindergarten, and all of the things that he was going to learn. Letters, shapes, colors, numbers, music, art… and he said, “and Jesus?”
And I had to tell him that no, he wouldn’t be learning about Jesus at the public school that I teach at, where he will attend in the fall.
My heart broke a little bit.
What a wonderful list! And how wonderful that in your waiting God granted you the desire of your heart.
Christina, your patience and waiting, and allowing God to chisel, and putting your marriage first – beautiful – just beautiful. And your kids are going to have the best teacher ever. I know I’ve learned from you
oh, and this is a thank you post – so let me see – second place goes to… Empathy from one brother to another… And first place goes to – homeschooling your boys – of course. God bless and keep you and each and every one of yours Christina.
I just wanted to let you know, that if you click your blog under MishMashMaggie, it takes you to a blog page of yours back from July, not the HOME page. Enjoy your Adventures!