When God Changes Your Plans

13. May 2013 · 10 comments · Categories: God's still working on me, Gratitude Community

023

My son was scheduled for sinus surgery a month ago. Two days before the surgery, he received medical clearance from the pediatrician that he was healthy and ready to go. The day before surgery however, he came down with a high fever. Needless to say, I had to call and cancel the surgery.

Sometimes, God changes our plans. Just this past week I became sick and had to ask someone at the last minutes to take over my bible study at church. While I know that “The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps” (Proverbs 16:9), I still get out of sorts when my plans are changed. I prefer to schedule things and know that they will take place. I like my life organized and without interruptions or delays.

But God knows better. He knows that what I don’t need is a life that runs smoothly and is chaos free. He knows that for me to grow in holiness, I need my plans interrupted. Because while intense growth often happens in the depths of trial and suffering, most of our growth in faith occurs in the mundane of daily life.

It’s in those small things, like cancelled plans or unexpected illness, where our holiness is forged. It happens when we are stuck in traffic, late to an appointment, and when we have to cancel a birthday party at the last minute because someone gets sick (done that!).

When we go along in our day and face an unexpected roadblock, we can fret, worry, and complain. We can become irritated with the slow clerk at the grocery store. We can blame the unhurried car in front of us for making us late. We can pull our hair out and stress over every inconvenience. Or we can submit to God’s work in our heart and follow the new path he’s brought us to. Remaining faithful, loving others when they don’t love us, and trusting in the face of worry-these are the fruits of God’s refining work through our daily circumstances.

Because we are sinful, it is hard to face the unexpected. Our natural response is to worry or become angry.This is why Jesus came. He lived a perfect life, faced every temptation we face, glorified his father in all the ordinary and mundane circumstances and trusted God’s redemptive plan. He carried all our sins on the cross-each worry, every angry thought, and all our sinful responses to the challenges of life-and died to free us from doing life our own way.

So while we can continue to make plans and arrange our days, our hearts are not dependent on them. Rather, we rely on God’s plan for our life. We believe that ”for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28). We trust his will and his sanctifying power in our lives. And because we are his children, we know that he disciplines us out of love (Hebrews 12:6).

When the first rays of morning shine its light in our bedroom window and we look ahead to the day’s plans, may we prostrate our hearts before our Father, saying “not my will, but yours be done.” As for my son’s surgery, it’s been rescheduled for this Wednesday, Lord willing. If you think of it, could you pray?

Joining friends in community to give thanks for the Lord’s loving and refining work in my heart: (#2165-2180)

knowing that God’s plan is good, my husband taking off work when I was sick, my son recovering from bronchitis, friends helping, finishing up our homeschool curriculum for the year, finishing the ladies bible study for the year, new books for summer vacay, planning our trip with friends, new writing opportunities, getting our water softener fixed (yay!), movie night at a friends house, a sweet friend who gave me a teacher appreciation gift, cute Mother’s Day crafts, friend bringing me an unexpected dinner, and a new couch.

Linking up with these friends:

A Holy Experience, Gracelaced, The Better Mom

Because I Can’t Make it On My Own

14. April 2013 · 13 comments · Categories: God's still working on me, Gratitude Community · Tags: , ,

While on vacation in Georgia recently, we took the boys hiking to the top of a long waterfall. It was a strenuous hike, straight uphill. It wasn’t long before my lungs protested. My husband asked, “Did you bring your inhaler?” “Nope,” I breathed out in a whoosh as I labored to breathe.

IMG_5811

It’s been almost a year since I last had trouble with my asthma. Since then, I’ve become confident in my ability to live life without an inhaler. I stopped carrying it in my purse and I’m pretty sure the one I have at home is expired.

The same thing happens in my spiritual life. I experience a season of intense growth and communion with Christ. Over time, I begin to feel confident and think I can flourish on my own. Days go by without me reading His word. My time becomes consumed with my desires and wants. I fail to pray about the decisions I make. My heart wanders. Before I know it, I am not abiding.

Like Adam and Eve, I think that I can be sustained by the fruit of the world. Like the prodigal son, I’ve left home to do life on my own. And then a trial comes into my life and I am unable to handle it. I find myself lost, alone, and afraid. I wonder how I got there. My breath is shallow, my thirst is great, and I’m so hungry. Then I realize, I’ve forgotten the One who gives me daily breath. Instead of drinking Living Water, I’ve drunken from the water of the world that never satisfies. And I’m hungry because I haven’t feasted at the table of my Father.

“Then Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.” John 6:35

But unlike my asthma, I don’t have to go far to find the treatment I need. James says ”Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.” (4:8) Like the Father waiting for the lost son, God is ready to throw a party upon my return. And before I can whisper a simple ”I’m sorry”, He dresses me in his own clean clothes and pulls out a chair for me to sit.

We eat until the sky is dark and the moon is high. My heart is full and my thirst is sated. After feasting from my Father’s table, I realize just how rich and satisfying it is and how poorly I’ve been eating while on my own.

Hiking without an inhaler reminded me just how much I take breathing for granted. It also reminded me how much I take my relationship with God for granted. I cannot do life without Him. Just as my lungs cannot breathe on their own apart from the rest of the systems in my body, I cannot function apart from the vine of Christ. I must abide, not just weekly on Sundays, not even daily during planned Bible reading times, but moment by moment, with each and every breath I take.

“Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.” John 15:4

Giving thanks for breath and counting graces #2146-2164:

Three weeks vacation with the family, attending NBA games, visiting old friends, making new friends, the kids seeing snow fall for the first time, walks in the woods, hiking to Amicalola Falls, going to the TGC National Conference, hearing testimonies of people who have come to Christ because of missions in the Middle East, meeting favorite authors, my MIL watching the boys so I could attend the conference, productive and encouraging meetings with other writers, etc., doing a Juvenile Diabetes walk as a family, district Pinewood Derby race where my son won first place, one of my besties moving close by and getting to visit her new home, loads and loads of laundry to do, a new drum in our dryer so I can do that laundry:)

Linking up with these friends:

A Holy Experience, Gracelaced, The Better Mom

 

The One Story That Moves Me Most of All

25. March 2013 · 6 comments · Categories: Gratitude Community, Spiritual Growth · Tags:
This is an updated post from the archives. I though it was appropriate as we prepare for Holy Week.

I once held the hands of a rape victim while we sat in a hospital waiting room. We spoke different languages, but I could read her story in her two black overflowing pools. They spoke volumes, without a word being spoken.

I’ve sat with parents in court while they watched their child brought forward to speak to the judge. They saw their child’s hands chained. Their striped clothing was a glaring reminder of where their child had just been. We talked of their disappointment, confusion and sadness.

I’ve listened to women recount stories of their spouse’s rage. They trembled in fear, visibly shaken as they talked. Their eyes looked off into the distance, seeing memories they wish they could forget. We took photos of their wounds and bruises and kept them safe.

I’ve had a child talk to me about finding his mother dead, by her very own hand. Little by little, we talked about the lasting horror, bitterness, and pain.

Over the years, I’ve heard countless stories of pain, abuse, loss, and fear. Many caused my eyes to burn with unshed tears. Some mirrored my own pains. And each one moved me to compassion.

But the story that moves me most is the one story that all the others point to. It’s a story of pain that was written to heal our pain. It’s a story of loss that was written so that we might gain.

It’s the story of Easter.

This next week, we celebrate how God Himself stepped into the story of redemption, becoming man and living in this world of sin and sorrow. He joined us in our pain, experiencing it for Himself: sorrow, temptation, despair, humiliation, rejection, torture and death. He penned a story of healing in blood-His own blood. As Tim Keller has written, “God takes our misery and suffering so seriously that he was willing to take it on himself.”

God knows each of our stories. He knows each and every ache and sorrow. He hears the deepest cries of our heart. The story of Easter is God’s response to the stories of pain that we all share.

The wonder of it all pierces my heart; God becoming man and dying for me?

My mind cannot comprehend it-a holy, perfect God lowering Himself into the mess of my life. All the tears I’ve cried, He’s caught each and every one. He’s taken my story of brokenness and written in His own prose of grace. He became broken so that I would be made whole. He died so that I might live.

The story of Easter begins with death but ends at resurrection. And it’s because of Jesus’ resurrection on that first Easter morning that we have been freed from the chains of eternal death. And one day, we will enter the next chapter of that endless story where words like pain, sorrow and brokenness don’t exist and instead there is only happiness and joy.

“But for them it was only the beginning of the real story. All their life in this world and all their adventures in Narnia had only been the cover and title page: now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story, which no one on earth has read: which goes on for ever: in which every chapter is better than the one before.” The Last Battle, C.S. Lewis

But he was pierced for our rebellion, crushed for our sins. He was beaten so we could be whole. He was whipped so we could be healed. Isaiah 53:5

 

Linking up with:

 

GraceLaced Mondays

 

Seeking the Wonder

10. March 2013 · 3 comments · Categories: Gratitude Community, One Word

As you know, my “one word” this year is Seek. My heart’s desire this year is to seek God with all that I am. It’s only been two months, but my journey has been rich and filling. Yet there is still far to go. While in most travels we seek only the destination, I am seeking to enjoy the journey.

Recently, I’ve been convicted of my cynical heart. I often view the world through a half empty glass and respond to life circumstances with sarcasm and a “what did you expect?” kind of mentality.

But I want to wear different glasses. I want to seek the wonder of God. I want to be wonderstruck by His creation, by His power, His love, by all things little and all things great. My kids are easily impressed and fascinated by every new thing they learn. As an adult, it seems as though the more we know, the less in awe we are. There is less discovery and amazement and more boredom and cynicism. I want to recapture that amazement that my children have.

ethan running

Like someone visiting the ocean for the first time, I want to be blown away by the magnificent wonder of who God is.

In fact, I live by the ocean but I rarely go there. I’ve become jaded. I take life for granted. I forget that all is grace and the simple fact that I breath in and exhale again is a wonder in and of itself. Each day is a gift, not a guarantee. The bed I lay in at night, the car I drive, my family, the friends I hang out with, all gifts of abundant grace. Because I don’t deserve a even a single thing.

And yet God give and gives. Amazing grace!

beach3

“The deeper we grow in the Spirit of Jesus Christ, the poorer we become - the more we realize that everything in life is a gift. The tenor of our lives becomes one of humble and joyful thanksgiving. Awareness of our poverty and ineptitude causes us to rejoice in the gift of being called out of darkness into wondrous light and translated into the kingdom of God’s beloved Son.” Brennan Manning in The Ragamuffin Gospel

To peel away my layers of cynicism, I need to get up close and see the glorious wonder of God from a different perspective. Instead of just looking at the landscape of life from a distance, I need to get near and look at the detailed brush strokes, the varying hues of color, and the creativity of the Artist. I need to get out my magnifying glass and see the marvelous design of this life He’s given me.

Because if I don’t, I’ll live as though I’ve seen it all and there is nothing left to see. Like someone who has been in church their entire lives and thinks they’ve heard it all, I don’t want my faith to become luke warm. I want it to be vibrant and alive. I don’t want my relationship with Christ to be like an old married couple who just tolerates each other, merely marking off the years. I want to be passionate about my love for Christ. And I want it to change me, shake me, and transform me.

As I continue in this journey, I am seeking Him and the wonder of who He is, the wonder of His love, the wonder of His creative works, and the wonder of His redemptive plan. I’m diving into His Word, seeking the wonder of His story. I’m seeking Him like a child in prayer, marveling at the way He answers and provides. I’m looking for Jesus in all the details of my daily life.

Because His grace is everywhere and all of life is grace.

“We should be astonished at the goodness of God, stunned that He should bother to call us by name, our mouths wide open at His love, bewildered that at this very moment we are standing on holy ground.” Brennan Manning in The Ragamuffin Gospel

What is causing you to wonder in amazement today?

Rejoicing at the wonder of grace in community (#2133-2145):

Life, breath, and everything else (Acts 17:25)

The feel of crisp cool air

Steam rising off the top of the pool

Being invited to contribute to a new project with the CBMW.

Courage

Reaching 1000 likes on my FB page

My son asking me to have a sleep over with him:)

The grace God has given my kids who’ve been sick the past month but have handled it well

The joy found in prayer

The lessons in faith I learn as we study missionaries in homeschool

Friends who pray for me and support me in this journey

Isaiah 43:19

Linking up with:

Sowing Seeds Through Our Stories

03. March 2013 · 7 comments · Categories: Depression, From the Inside Out, Gratitude Community, grief, Spiritual Growth

“Those who sow with tears will reap with songs of joy. Those who go out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with them.” Psalm 126:5-6

Only God knows the number of tears I have cried in my life. My teen years were filled with more tears than smiles. I know I cried a river each time my one of my children were wheeled away into surgery. I’ve cried out in desperation to God over my failures as a mom. And I’ve wept over losses, failed dreams, and unexpected trials.

Source

As one who struggles with depression, tears are my constant companion. I’ve struggled with the weight of them and have begged God to take them away. The book of Psalms has always been a balm to my wounded heart, reflecting my pain and sorrow in its songs of lament. It was in Psalm 126 where God taught me that while the pain that accompanies my sorrow is hard, it is not without purpose.

Psalm 126 refers to a time in Israel’s history when they returned from exile. The pain and sorrow of their captivity finally came to an end. Our own sorrow will not last forever either; there will be an end. Elsewhere in the Psalms, we learn that “weeping may last for the night, but joy comes in the morning.” Spurgeon said of Psalm 126, “Hence, present distress must not be viewed as if it would last forever; it is not the end, by any means, but only a means to the end. Sorrow is our sowing, rejoicing shall be our reaping. If there were no sowing in tears there would be no reaping in joy.”

We must sow our tears. We can’t let them fall just anywhere, they must fall in a place where they can be planted and nourished. Our tears are not for us alone but are to be used for God’s glory. In planting our tears, we are promised that they will produce a harvest of joy.

Our Savior was familiar with sorrow; Scripture refers to him as “a man of sorrows.” He took on skin and walked among us, experiencing the same pain and suffering we experience. He wasn’t just here as a tourist, to merely observe what it was like to be human in a fallen world. He entered into the grief and pain of humanity and felt the agony of human life. But Jesus knew that “joy comes in the morning” and sowed his tears as he hung on the cross. Scripture tells us in Hebrews 12:2 that he did this “for the joy set before him.” And what was that joy?—our salvation and the restoration of our relationship with God.

How can we sow our tears? First, we must always bring our tears to Jesus. We need to lament in prayer before Him and know that he catches each tear in a bottle. He sees and cares about each and every tear that we cry. Our faith and love for him will strengthen as we trust him to use those captured tears for his glory. In prayer, we’ll plant our tears for the salvation of loved ones, for those hurting, for our own sin and for growth in our faith.

Matthew Henry wrote, “there are tears which are themselves the seed that we must sow, tears of sorrow for sin, our own and others, tears of sympathy with the afflicted church, and the tears of tenderness in prayer and under the word. These are precious seed, such as the husbandman sows when corn is dear and he has but little for his family, and therefore weeps to part with it, yet buries it under ground, in expectation of receiving it again with advantage.”

We also need to consider how we can use our tears to encourage others with the same encouragement Christ has given us. Our tears will reap a harvest for the kingdom when we reach out to others in the name of Jesus. God will not waste our tears. He collects each and every one and uses them in His redemptive plan. We can sow our tears when we tell our stories to one another. When we share our stories of hope in the midst of pain, of healing from wounds, and of resurrected joy, God uses those stories to reap a harvest in someone else’s life.

We may not see the final harvest of our sowing. But we sow because we trust that God will weave our stories of sorrow into the Greater Story of Redemption. What we can’t see now will make sense in eternity. Each of our stories are important to the final tapestry of grace. We have to sow in faith and believe that one day, “He will wipe away every tear from our eyes.”

When life’s circumstances bring sorrow, may we sow our tears in prayer. May we trust that God will not waste our tears but will use each and every one. May we reach out to those God has placed in our life and share our stories with them. And may each tear we sow be used for His glory, bringing in the harvest full of eternal joy.

What is your story? How might God be using your tears in His Greater Story?

Linking up with the Gratitude Community, sharing God’s endless grace in my life: (#2118-2132)

that our tears are never wasted

that God uses each one

that one day we will see the full harvest of joy

that Jesus knows and understands the tears we cry

that Jesus was willing to take on all my sorrows at the cross

that one day, all our tears will be wiped away forever

that my own tears remind me that this world is not my home

my Indelible Grace station on Pandora:)

celebrating the return of Psyche with my besties and all things pineapple

seeing God at work through prayer

the way He works in and through our weakness

going to see Casting Crowns with my husband, just the two of us

my youngest asking me to stay for a sleep over in his room:)

making the Great Wall of China with my son as a homeschool project-so fun!

Great Wall

 

 

Seeking Him Through Pain

17. February 2013 · 7 comments · Categories: Anxiety, Depression, From the Inside Out, Gratitude Community, One Word

It came upon me quickly. Like someone sneaking up from behind, I was startled in surprise. My heart was heavy, my stomach was in knots and tears burned my eyes. Worrisome and hopeless thoughts swirled around in my mind.

Despair.

Depression has long been my tormentor. It is a dark cloud that most often there in the distance, reminding me that it could storm at any time. And then sometimes it grows into a vicious tempest, bringing with it dark thoughts and swirling emotions. Ironically, I had just been to my doctor and remarked on how long it had been since my last episode.

I told myself to stop-to stop thinking about what was bothering me. I tried to focus on getting my kids rounded up for bedtime. But the heaviness of despair followed me around the house. It whispered words untrue and bore down hard on my soul.

open gate

And then deep inside arose a desire, a strong thirst to be with God. I felt a desperate longing to just be in His presence and pour my burdens at His feet. I wanted to go into my room, shut the door and pray, but I couldn’t just then. So I prayed quick prayers, “God please help me” and got my boys into bed.

Then I ran straight into my Abba’s arms. I opened my prayer journal to scratch out my despair on paper. I emptied my heart of all that weighed me down and poured out all my worrisome thoughts at His feet. And as I wrote, the pages of my journal became damp with round droplets of tears.

046

I prayed through the gospel, reminding myself of who God is and who I am because of Christ. I reflected on all He has done for me, presenting my prayer wrapped in a gift of thanksgiving. Pausing between sentences, I waited for His response.

And He gave me what I came to seek, a peace that passes all understanding.

The power of prayer is strong. The more I seek Him, the more I want to seek Him. Being dependent and helpless before the throne is the only place I want to be. No matter how strong the despair or heavy the worries, I know that He is ready and able to take to them. It’s because He carried my greatest burden at the cross that I know He can handle all that weighs on me today. Also because of the cross, there’s nothing that can keep me from coming into His presence.

A note on writing prayers: It wasn’t until after I had children that I began to write my prayers in a journal. Having little ones always underfoot became a constant distraction to my prayers. Writing them down became a way for me to stay focused. Since then, my prayer life has only grown deeper and richer from the habit. Not only that, it has been a means of grace for me with my ongoing battle with the depressive thoughts in my mind. We’ve been talking about writing prayers in my ladies Bible study at my church. If it’s not something you have ever tried, I recommend it. This past week, the ladies and I decorated prayer journals. It was so fun!

Counting grace in community (#2108-2117):

thankful for the power of prayer

that I can seek Him no matter what is going on, He accepts me just as I am

that He took away my despair

that I can lean on Him every day

fun homeschool co-op playing with live lobsters

getting in to see the dr. to find out that my youngest has an ear and sinus infection

getting confirmation from the dr that it was a wise decision to take my son off of the medication that we believe caused him to be moody and nearly depressed

Making prayer journals with the ladies at Bible study this week-so much fun!

taking the boys to their first hockey game

 

 

Linking up today with these friends:

 

 

 

 

GraceLaced Mondays

TheBetterMom.com

 

 

 

 

When the Heart Wanders

10. February 2013 · 27 comments · Categories: Gratitude Community

Have you ever prayed for something and God answered your prayer, just not in the way you expected?

This past week, I beheld grace face to face and the reflection I saw of my heart was not immediate joy. Instead, like the Israelites in the desert, my response was ungrateful and filled with discontentment.

I’ve wanted a new dishwasher. I’ve prayed about it. I’ve made it known to my family that I wanted one. I returned home from being out with my mother-in-law last weekend to a surprise-a new dishwasher. My boy’s faces were full of expectation and excitement. They had worked hard the night before helping my husband install it.

And what did I say when I saw it? “That’s not the one I would have chosen. I really wanted to go to the appliance store and select it myself.”

Yes, it was quite shameful.

I’ve spent the past few years searching for joy, seeking out His grace, counting all His gifts, and when one came unexpectedly, I didn’t even see it. I prayed for a dishwasher and He provided one. How could I then miss it?

Sometimes, God answers our requests in ways we wouldn’t expect:

  • you’ll gather bread every morning off the ground to eat
  • to conquer the city, you’ll have to walk around it seven times
  • to restore your health, you’ll have to dunk in the river seven times
  • you’ll conquer a large army with a mere three hundred men
  • go lay your nets in the water even though you’ve fished all day and haven’t caught a thing
  • sell everything you have if you want to follow me

Like the Israelites, I complain I am hungry and then complain when He feeds me. I ask for healing and then doubt that His cure really works. I seek His wisdom and then say it’s not the wisdom I was looking for. I face giants and cry out for His help and then say the help He offers isn’t enough.

Yet the wonder of it all, His grace is greater than my weak faith, my ungrateful heart, and my selfish ways. Christ came to save me from myself because I couldn’t. The essence of grace is that it is undeserved and undeserving is what I am. But He not only gave me grace once at the cross to save me from eternity apart from God, He gives me grace every day, every moment, and saves me from the sin that still remains in my heart.

I am a wanderer, wandering all over this desert life. Always trying to do life on my own and then complaining when God doesn’t ride in like a knight in shining armor to rescue me. Easily forgetful, I fail to remember what He has done and what He has promised. But for grace, I would be a hopeless mess. Because of grace, my messes are cleansed by the blood of the Lamb.

Singing this song today, thankful for a new dishwasher, grace, and for Christ who always leads my wandering heart safely back home.

 

Come, Thou Fount of every blessing
Tune my heart to sing Thy grace
Streams of mercy never ceasing
Call for songs of loudest praise
Teach me some melodious sonnet
Sung by flaming tongues above
Praise His Name, I’m fixed upon it
Name of God’s redeeming love

Oh, to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be
Let Thy goodness like a fetter
Bind my wandering heart to Thee
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it
Prone to leave the God I love
Here’s my heart, oh, take and seal it
Seal it for Thy courts above

Here’s my heart, oh, take and seal it
Seal it for Thy courts above

(Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing)

Counting grace in community (#2091-2107):

God’s endless supply of grace

that no matter how far I wander, He always finds me

for my sweet boys who wanted me to have a new dishwasher

for their forgiveness of my lack of gratitude

for clean dishes:)

for answered prayer

Thin Mints cookies

the boys getting out their train tracks after many months of neglect and building a track

our Apologia science curriculum-I just love it!

hot tea for my cold

getting a sample of my son’s medicine at the doctor so I wouldn’t have to pay a fortune to fill the prescription

boys swimming in the pool in February:)

a fun Pinewood Derby race-Ethan won first in his den:)

the amazing things that kids can construct from PVC pipes and the even more amazing thing it becomes when it’s attached to the pool fountain

my dear friend buying a house closer to me:)

a picnic at the park after church

 

 

Linking up today with these friends:

 

 

 

 

GraceLaced Mondays

TheBetterMom.com

The Light of Grace

03. February 2013 · 10 comments · Categories: Gratitude Community

pool

It is morning, not too long after the sun rise. The back of our house faces east, toward the rising sun. It’s light first enters the screen enclosure and dances across the top of the pool. Then the warm rays are welcomed through the twenty foot wide sliding glass doors at the back of our house.

I see the light shining through the sliding doors, highlighting one spot in the house, the dining table. With all the light’s off in the great room, it’s glow catches my eye and I grab the camera to capture it.

IMG_5567

Counting God’s gifts of grace is a lot like the ray of sunshine on my dining table. It’s finding pockets of light in the darkness. It’s stopping to notice and appreciate the ways He loves us. It’s finding joy in the wonder of the moment. It’s recognizing His gifts of grace and returning back to Him our own gift of thanksgiving.

Because no matter what is going on in our day, His grace is always there. God is always good and that is reason alone to rejoice. Yet there are countless reasons to give Him thanks. He paints the sky in varying hues that take our breath away. He dresses the flowers at our doorstep, more luxurious than our most expensive outfit. He provides for our every need. Even our very breath is a gift of grace (Acts 17:25).

God shines a spotlight on the stage of life, revealing His grace. Will we see it? Will we focus our attention on it? Will we cheer with joy? Or will the curtain fall at the end of the show and we miss it entirely?

“Receive every day as a resurrection from death, as a new enjoyment of life; meet every rising sun with such sentiments of God’s goodness, as if you had seen it, and all things, new-created upon your account: and under the sense of so great a blessing, let your joyful heart praise and magnify so good and glorious a Creator.” William Law

Counting graces in community today (#2074-2090):

the light of the sun

the way God’s light shines in the darkness

the freedom to be weak and trust in His strength

holding a sweet baby boy

friends who rejoice with me

seeking joy with small group friends

my son bringing up spiritual lessons he learned during our morning devotional time later in the day and his applying those truths to other areas and circumstances

comfy chairs

leaving love notes for my boys

making Middle Eastern food for dinner because we are studying it in school

seeing God at work, trusting that He is faithful

listening to my youngest sing in the shower:)

going through the grocery store with both boys and there were no incidents!

Taking my MIL to see Screwtape Letters ontstage-it was so good!

Returning home to find the house not the wreck I thought it would be and in fact clean:)

a new dishwasher

 

Linking up today with these friends:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

GraceLaced Mondays

 

Come to Him Like a Child

27. January 2013 · 7 comments · Categories: Gratitude Community, One Word

This year I am calling “The Year of Seeking After God.” Seek is my ‘one word’ for the year. In my desire to seek after God, I hope to grow deeper in my prayer life. After all, prayer is one of the main ways to seek God. I mentioned last week that I’ve been reading a book on prayer with the ladies at my church. In A Praying Life: Connecting With God In A Distracting World, Paul Miller encourages us to stop trying to dress up our prayers to make them look good before approaching God. He suggests that we instead come to God like little children.

Children live and explore life on a different level than adults. They live in the moment, pausing to enjoy every little discovery, while we as adults bear the burdens of the world on our shoulders. They marvel at everything, even the seemingly insignificant and unimportant. From a slimy worm to a rock on the ground, from a lollipop at the bank to a silly joke they made up, children enjoy all of life. They voice excitement for any reason and hold nothing back. Children always say exactly what is on their minds, they don’t care about getting messy, and they love with passion.

To be like a child with God is to simply be free to come just as I am.

Yes, this is me:) Taken by my friend, Lisa Tarplee

Young children also know that they are helpless. They know that they us to meet their needs. It’s a given in their life that mommy and daddy are the ones they go to when they are hurt, hungry, sad, and afraid. And they call for us right away when they need help. ”Mommy, can I please have something to drink?” “Mommy, I need to go to the bathroom!” “Mommy, can you help me tie my shoes?”

Why can’t I be that way with my Abba?

I find it hard to be like a child in my relationship with my heavenly Father. I don’t live in the moment and fail to trust Him for the future. I rarely pause to enjoy the littlest blessings He provides. When I have a problem, I try to solve it on my own. When faced with a challenge, I worry and fret. And I don’t love Him with abandon or run to greet Him the way my son does my husband upon his return from work.

But I want to. I want to be like a child with my Abba. I want to trust Him completely for my every need. I want to believe that He knows what is best for me. I want to run free and wild in my faith and feel the wind of His love blow softly against my cheek. I want to share with Him all the little discoveries and experiences of my day. I want to laugh with joy, knowing that all my worries and cares are in His sovereign hands.

When it comes to praying like a child, I need to pray with great expectation. Instead of being a realist, I need to share with Him my hopes and dreams. I need to come to Him as I am, messes and all, and without shame. And those to-do lists, prayer programs, and proper sentence structure-I need to leave all those behind.

In A Praying Life: Connecting With God In A Distracting World, Miller also suggests that if there are worries or other distractions on our mind when we begin praying, we ought to pray about those concerns first. Or as Lewis wrote in Letters to Malcolm: Chiefly on Prayer, “We must lay before Him what is in us, not what ought to be in us.” When we try to force those things out of our minds, they inevitably sneak back in and we spend our prayer time distracted. Like a child speaking out loud all the thoughts on their mind, we need to enter into prayer with all our disconnected thoughts and concerns.

It’s okay to pray messy, broken prayers because that’s exactly how we come to God through the gospel-messy and broken.

It is hard on my own to peel back the layers and find my inner child-like faith. But with Christ, all things are possible. When I focus on the freedom I have to just be myself with Him, my heart starts skipping with the release of all my worries. As I dwell on a Love so strong that He would enter into my messy life so that I could become a child of God, my heart begins to run with wild abandon. And before I know it, my heart is soaring on the winds of grace as a beloved child of my Father.

Giving thanks in community (#2060-2073):

seeking Him in prayer

learning and growing

faith talks with my oldest

kindness from new friends

being amazed by grace

doing spelling words with Scrabble Cheez-its in homeschool-a big hit!

peace of heart

answered prayers and miracles

encouraging emails from complete strangers

my husband and kids going to my in-laws for the night

a whole 24 hours to myself!

a girl’s night out with friends

strawberry season in Florida

Linking up today with these friends:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

https://christianmommyblogger.com/

Beholding Glory

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

GraceLaced Mondays

 

Seeking Him Through Prayer

20. January 2013 · 13 comments · Categories: Gratitude Community, One Word

338

It’s a new year and a new semester for bible studies at my church. Sitting with the ladies in our study last week, I listened to each person share their thoughts and struggles with prayer. Nodding my head at each comment, I realized that we all were on the same journey. Prayer is a mysterious thing, one we often wonder if we’ll ever figure out.

And then one friend asked “What do you think the purpose of prayer is?”

Good question.

This year my heart’s one word focus is on seeking Christ. He promises that if I seek him with all my heart, I will find him. So it’s no coincidence that I chose a book on prayer to go through with the ladies at my church this semester. Prayer is a key component to my seeking him and I hope to explore deeper into the heart of prayer this year in an effort to join in the divine conversation with my Heavenly Father.

For much of my life, I’ve used prayer like a heavenly candy machine. I told God everything I wanted and then waited for it all to fall into my waiting hands. When I didn’t get what I asked for, I despaired and wondered where I went wrong.

I’ve also treated prayer like a duty, a chore to be completed every day. I had my method and my checklist and I felt good when I prayed correctly and guilty when I didn’t.

And then there were the times when I barely gave prayer a thought, unless I was facing a trial or challenge of some kind. Then I prayed and expected Him to be right there, anxiously waiting to answer my request, like my own personal butler, always at my service.

But then things changed in my relationship with God and my prayers started to change as a result. I began to see prayer as an opportunity to spend time with a person, my best friend. I found it not as a means to an end, but the end itself, a way into the very presence of my Abba. I found prayer to be a still place to sit in his presence and feel the warmth of his grace.

Most importantly, I’ve come to see prayer as the door that leads to the Source of all I ever wanted-not to my supplier of all I want, because all I ever wanted was the Source himself. It is God my soul needs most, not what he can give me.

This kind of prayer is relational. It’s about getting to know my Abba. It’s about communion and connection with my Savior. It’s about me being me and God meeting me right where I am. It’s about being still, listening more than talking, and seeking more than asking. It’s about removing all the unimportant things in my heart that get in the way of communion with him. It’s about wanting to be with him more than wanting anything he can give me.

Seeking God in prayer then becomes a daily death of myself and a humble posture of my heart. It requires a laying down of my daily burdens and a picking up of the weightless yoke of Christ. Praying this way means I sacrifice my will and expectations, submitting to the work of the Surgeon’s hands upon my heart.

And so I talk to Him all day. I share the thoughts and feelings on my heart, telling him where I am at that moment in my relationship with him. I come to him as I am, messes and all. I evaluate and purge what’s going on in my heart that keeps me from him. I reflect on what the gospel means to me and how I need it more today than I needed it the day before. I voice my worries, concerns, fears, hopes and dreams. I focus on him as the first thing and then on the second things, like my wants and needs second. And I dwell on the amazing grace and mercy of the One who made it possible for me to enter into the holy of holy’s.

Because prayer goes hand in hand with my growth in holiness, it is an ongoing journey of transformation, of change, of ups and downs, of brokenness and adulation, of peeling back layers and going deeper. My prayers change as I change. Whatever is happening in my heart comes out in prayer, the good, bad, and ugly. But no matter how messy my life gets this year, I know that the gospel cleanses not only myself, but each and every imperfect prayer I pray.

As I seek God this year, I face prayer with great expectation. I look forward to learning more and growing more in my prayer life. I anticipate new discoveries, new depths to plumb, and new riches of grace to explore in my prayers with God. And I know I will find him, when I seek him with all my heart.

How about you? What lessons do you hope to learn and grow in this year?

Giving thanks in community for new journeys (#2043-2059):

my ladies bible study starting up again

studying prayer using this book: A Praying Life: Connecting With God In A Distracting World

expectations for a deeper, fuller prayer life

having such beautiful friends to walk with in the journey

coupon for a free coffee

watching my kids battle their sin and overcome it

writing for hours at Panera

my husband finally getting a new (used) car

seeing patience in my oldest

learning a new game in homeschool for our study of Africa-mancala

leftovers

watching old Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys dvds with my kids

the boys testing for their yellow belts in Tae Kwon Do

doors that open when I least expect it

being humbled by my own words

hosting new church visitors for dinner

021

 

069Linking up with these friends:

 

 

 

 

 

 

https://christianmommyblogger.com/

Beholding Glory

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

GraceLaced Mondays

 

 

« Older articles