I look into her eyes open wide. She stares at me and I at her. I marvel at the wonder of His handiwork. Ten tiny fingers and ten tiny toes, all knitted together by the Father’s hand.
We had prayed for months for this sweet baby. Each night the boys and I would cover her in prayer. We asked for her protection and safety in the womb while her mother underwent cancer treatments. A living answer to prayer, this little one grabs hold of my finger the way all babies do. And I think about the Father’s love.
It was His love that knitted this little blessing together. It was His love that cradled her close as her little fingers and toes grew. And it was His love that brought her through those many months of fear, questions, and uncertainty.
Like her fingers wrapped around mine, it’s His love that doesn’t let go.
When He answers prayer the way I want, I praise Him. Do I do the same when He says “no” or “wait”? When hard things happen in my life, will I still marvel at His love?
Or will I doubt and think that He has let go of me?
Scripture promises that nothing can tear us away from His love for us. God the Father loves us as much as He loves the Son. As much? Even though I fail Him, doubt Him, distrust Him, and question Him?
When I despair over the unexpected events in life and think that He has let go of me, maybe it’s that I’ve let go of Him. Like Peter on the water, I look down and away from Him. Focusing on my problems, searching for solutions, and trusting in myself, I sink in the waves. And I blame Him for letting go.
He never lets go. When I run away, He’s the Father waiting for my return. When I wander from Him, He’s the Shepherd who leaves the rest to rescue me. When I deny Him, He’s the Savior asking the Father for my forgiveness. When I stumble in the waves of fear, He’s there to pick me up.
When prayers aren’t answered the way I want, He’s there telling me to wait and watch. He reminds me that He’s writing a story to which only He knows the end. Pointing me to John’s vision of eternity, He promises that all of my prayers will one day be answered. All things will turn out for good.
I know He doesn’t have to answer prayer. Yet in the wonderful mystery of divine love, He chooses to use my prayers to carry out His will.
As I hold an answer to one of my most fervent prayers, she reminds me that God never lets go.
“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39
Counting His love in community (#1684-1699)
that He never lets go of me
for all the times He’s gone and found me when I’ve wandered
for all the times He’s waited for my return when I’ve rebelled
for all the times He’s caught me when I’ve fallen
for all the times He’s forgiven me when I denied Him
For my friend’s healing
for her sweet baby girl
getting coffee in the mail I had won at Michele-Lyn’s place
my oldest loving his Lego robotics camp
new recipe for grilled cheese: raisin bread, havarti, and apple slices
My lengthy allergy test for penicillin came back negative
Watching Ethan’s robotics championship
hosting a party to say goodbye to good friends who are moving to the other side of the world
the blessing of that friendship
the support of my church community
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