My life as a mom is always changing, moment by moment, day by day. My boys continue to grow and become more independent. Some days they take little steps away from me, just practicing their wings. And other days, it seems like they are on the verge of jumping out of the nest altogether. While I appreciate the increasing freedom their maturity gives me, it makes me sad as well.
Long gone are the mornings spent watching the news with my oldest on my lap. Sippy cup full of milk and sleepies in his eyes, we’d snuggle the morning away.
Long gone are the spontaneous hugs, tears when I leave, and “mommy, will you please play with me?”
Now our mornings start off with him getting himself dressed, playing a computer game, and then wandering off to build with his legos. This morning was no different, except for an argument thrown into the mix. He didn’t like a decision I had made and argued with me about it. I talked with him about his tendency to debate and question my reason. A purely logical thinker, I often wonder if he will study law. I look at him some days and catch a glimpse of what he’ll look like as a teen. I can only imagine how advanced his debating skills will be by then. When he continued questioning my logic, I took away a privilege for the day.
From then on, he was noticeably irritated with me.
We then headed for my haircut appointment. I realized just this week that he is now old enough to sit still and read while I get a cut, so I took him along with me. Long gone are the days where I would never have even considered bringing him along. At seven and a half, he no longer runs around touching everything in sight. He can sit for long periods of time, quietly reading or playing a game. It suddenly hit me that we’ve now crossed into another stage of maturity, another step of independence away from me.
My stylist points to the chair next to the one I’ll be sitting in and tells him to sit there. He plops down with my phone in his hand, poised to play a game. She then leads me to the back of the salon to wash my hair before cutting it. I notice that he had followed us. “Ethan, you can sit in the chair up there and wait. We’ll be right back,” I informed him.
He looks me in the eyes and says quietly, “It’s too far.”
I lie my head back against the sink, eyes burning with unshed tears. While my all too independent seven and a half-year old will continue to take steps of independence as he grows and matures–
he’ll always be my little boy.
Counting the joy in the midst of life’s changes (#1662-1683)
that God would entrust me with these eternal souls to love, teach, and care for
that boys always love their momma
getting a hair cut while my son quietly sat nearby
playing new games with the boys
spending a day in pj’s (well most of it:)
4th of July traditions with friends
no little hands getting burnt by sparklers
starting the process of ordering homeschool supplies for this next year
dark chocolate covered almonds
a surprise gift from a friend–from Anthropologie:)
A friend giving away shoes because she is moving overseas–yay for new-to-me shoes!
a week of frustration with the kids turned into a week of teaching moments
the boys digging out the train tracks they never play with and setting them up under the dining table
time alone to write and think
a coffee date with a friend
less than two weeks until SheSpeaks!
this quote, from my pastor: “God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called”
an amazing sermon on God’s amazing grace from 1 Timothy 1
skyping with my husband while he is at work